awkwardbrucewayne replied to your post:
Wait, you have stuff here? That’s weird. Umm. Lemme ask Alfred if we have a lost and found around here.There’s no need to call your manservant when I am well aware of it’s location. Now if you’ll excuse me.
[yawns, waves him off] Yeah, go ahead. Just, you know, don’t rifle around in my stuff while you’re th……
awkwardbrucewayne replied to your post
//I already killed you. It didnt take.
It’s because I took a bath in your lazarus pit right after my body was removed from the train you allowed to kill me.
You. Are. A. Hypocrite. Detective.
Aww man, sorry, I got possessed by your daughter there for a minute.
What?
codename-noir started following you
Codename? I got a codename.
It’s “oh Bruce ohgod yes.”
“I’m sure it is.”
“You know it. And then sometimes it’s ‘Bruce, why didn’t you call me?’ and I’m all like ‘who’re you?’ and she’s all like ‘Bruce, you bastard!’ and then sometimes I get hit. It’s hard being a Wayne.”
“Were you saying something?”
“No, I wasn’t saying anything at all. Just listening to you.”
“That’s cool, that’s cool. It’s important to be a good listener. Here, I’ma sing a song for you to listen to.”
thecatwithagun started following you
Cool, um, mask or something. [burps drunkenly]
Thank you. It’s always lovely to see Gotham’s resident rich-boy train wreck. How are you, dear?
Eh, can’t complain. I mean, I could complain, but that would be, I dunno, kind of a bummer, you know? Tuesday I went to the bank and you know what they told me?
‘Oh, we’re sorry, Mr. Wayne, but there’s a $10,000 limit on cash withdrawals.’
I was like, dude, what? I mean, normally it’s a bad idea to carry that much cash on you, but you can’t slip plastic in a working girl’s bikini, you know what I mean?
Assholes. What’s this country coming to…
The Wayne will BRB.
“Wisdom,” he agreed. He ogled his date’s cleavage briefly. It was fake, but billionaires couldn’t be choosers. Or something.Fake or not, they were a great set of boobs on both the ladies. There were flying mushrooms and swimming arrows yet none of it seemed strange. Everything was normal and normal was real to him.
“We need to get Alfred to set up more of these play dates.”
“For reals, bro.” He needed this kind of a break sometimes. Vacation away from vacation. It was tough to be a Wayne, especially when those old guys on the WE board kept wanting him to go golfing or some shit.
He was momentarily distracted from his view of the nearby boobs by an old man floating past the yacht in a small boat.
“Look, dude - it’s Ducard.”
Codename? I got a codename.
It’s “oh Bruce ohgod yes.”
“I’m sure it is.”
“You know it. And then sometimes it’s ‘Bruce, why didn’t you call me?’ and I’m all like ‘who’re you?’ and she’s all like ‘Bruce, you bastard!’ and then sometimes I get hit. It’s hard being a Wayne.”
“Were you saying something?”
WHAT?
FREE PIZZA?
FUCK YEAH FUCK YEAH
